The hair is cut. My cartilage piercing is removed. I’m living out of one drawer.
We are coming down the last days of stripping – before the real stripping of formation begins, of course.
Stubborn insecurities are rearing their ugly heads in one last valiant stand. I haven’t had short hair since like 5th grade, because someone once mistook me for a boy.
And then there’s my old friend procrastination. I have a list of things to do before we leave on Saturday. Every night when he gets home from work my Dad asks what I got checked off on the list. My answer has been: Well, I went to Mass and spent hours in adoration today…
Jesus does not want to be used as productive procrastination. Oops. Today, I was finally bitten by the motivation bug. While setting up an appointment with my new eye doctor they asked for my address and phone number; my new address and phone number. And not even my phone number, because I won’t have a cell phone. The heart palpitations that followed that phone call told me: this is real and I’ve been in denial.
We come face to face once again with a strange phenomenon. No matter how much we want something, how much we know something is right, the fear of the unknown is still incredibly powerful. The trick is to rest in the sure knowledge of God’s will and know that the joy He wants to bestow is always worth it; it is certainly more powerful than fear.
I feel strangely light, perhaps due to the lack of hair. The smile I’ve been waking up with tells me differently, though.